Kaboose92

Seven years, ruined Nearly 5 years alone Took time to figure out who I am without someone Accepted the side of me I've denied for so many years I accepted I like both A friend, one night, one sentence I found someone else I found someone better I found someone patient and understanding Helped me get through walls the damage you caused created There is one wall left, one that won't be easy to break down. One we can't work together to bring down One you ruined my view of Seven years, ruined He understands why He will wait for as long as he needs He will continue loving me I will continue loving him He said 'I would say yes to you' He could tell

I gave you my heart of gold I gave you my soul of silver You turned around and melted them down Turned them into something else that you kept They're replaced by a broken crystal heart, by a paper soul I gave you my time, you made me regret it I hate myself for time I feel I wasted But the good memories you left me They haunt me like an ever growing shadow A shadow that won't let me see a future with anyone else That weaves itself into my thoughts When I think of a future with someone A future with anyone Whispering that I'll never have that again Not with her, or her, or her You've left me broken But thanks to my caring friends, I am strong

In the end She still said 'But I do love you' Yet she was with another man In the end I still loved her And I was with only her In the end It was a friend who helped me Patched my heart In the end I needed support I found it In the end I'm numb to the betrayal But I still love her In the end I'm not going back I'm going to move on In the end I feel so lonely Empty, but full In the end...

The light of your life When it starts flickering When it wavers Don't shut you door Don't blow out that candle Because another light may be behind you Because someone else may be your light All lights before may have come from intimacy All lights before may have been your 'one' This light may be something totally different A friend A mentor When my light started flickering Another started to brighten When my light gave it's warmth to someone else When it started being cold to me I had this new light, a warm light A dear friend, not a lover I never expected such a person could be that light I was blinded by intimacy I was healed by friendship

A smoking gun on the floor Blood on the wall My head feels lighter My eyes are opened My shoulders high My heart different What have I done Have I killed my demons Have I freed my emotions Have I done something good Have I done something bad I was in one state Now I'm in another Is this state better Is this state worse I'm confused Is this heaven or is this hell I'm still alive Or am I dead I miss them I want them back They say something They do another They confuse me My demons were my only company What have I done Did I do something good for me They're still here next to me A smoking gun on the floor Blood on the wall My head feels lighter