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About Deviant Kaboose9225/Male/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 9 Years
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In the end
In the end
She still said 'But I do love you'
Yet she was with another man
In the end
I still loved her
And I was with only her
In the end
It was a friend who helped me
Patched my heart
In the end
I needed support
I found it
In the end
I'm numb to the betrayal
But I still love her
In the end
I'm not going back
I'm going to move on
In the end
I feel so lonely
Empty, but full
In the end...
:iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 1 0
Another light
The light of your life
When it starts flickering
When it wavers
Don't shut you door
Don't blow out that candle
Because another light may be behind you
Because someone else may be your light
All lights before may have come from intimacy
All lights before may have been your 'one'
This light may be something totally different
A friend
A mentor
When my light started flickering
Another started to brighten
When my light gave it's warmth to someone else
When it started being cold to me
I had this new light, a warm light
A dear friend, not a lover
I never expected such a person could be that light
I was blinded by intimacy
I was healed by friendship
:iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0
Kinokashi Fanart :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 1 0 Death by jealousy :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 2 0 It's dangerous to go alone :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 1 0
Mature content
Take my Zenny and Rathian Rubies! :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0
My current thoughts
A smoking gun on the floor
Blood on the wall
My head feels lighter
My eyes are opened
My shoulders high
My heart different
What have I done
Have I killed my demons
Have I freed my emotions
Have I done something good
Have I done something bad
I was in one state
Now I'm in another
Is this state better
Is this state worse
I'm confused
Is this heaven or is this hell
I'm still alive
Or am I dead
I miss them
I want them back
They say something
They do another
They confuse me
My demons were my only company
What have I done
Did I do something good for me
They're still here next to me
A smoking gun on the floor
Blood on the wall
My head feels lighter
My eyes are opened
My shoulders high
My heart is different
What have I done
:iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 2 0
The Lamp Shade :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0 The Tricky Striker :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0 The Staggered Faceplant :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 1 0 The Door Knocker :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0 The Stuck Repairman :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0 The Illusionary Floater :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 1 0 The Fancy Dancer :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0 The Peeker :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0 The Fence Hanger :iconkaboose92:Kaboose92 0 0

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  • Listening to: Monstercat
  • Reading: Unsounded, Halo: The Thursday War
  • Watching: Rurouni Kenshin
  • Playing: The Division, Warframe, Monster Hunter generations
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Last Monday, my sister-in-law suddenly passed. I won't go into detail, but she slipped into a coma she didn't wake from. She technically wasn't my sister-in-law becasue she and my oldest bro weren't married, but she was family. Thanks to my work, I've been able to slowly cope with it. Few tears, but every night except last night has been sleepless since. I don't have much to say, just that I'm fine. My oldest brother isn't, no matter how fine he looks on the outside. Dealing with two boys from his marriage and his daughter from this relationship, as well as autopsy stuff, legal stuff, the chaos that follows a sudden death, all that... he hasn't broken down. He needs to, and that's why my niece's grandparents on my bro's gf's side took her for a few days and why my nephews' Mom took them back early. She lives in South Carolina, my bro is in Colorado, they share joint custody. She ad he are still good friends, though. She's staying there a few more days before flying back with the boys to take up the help my other brother was offering while out there. She's fine with my oldest bro breaking down on her, he's done it before and having been married for 7 years, together and a couple and friends for another 4 or so, she's seen it more than once and knows how to handle it. Anyway, the main reason I made this journal. Not pressuring anyone, I don't even expect one person to help, but I'm leaving this here to get all the help for my oldest bro I can. My paychecks are so small and like 90% spoken for by the time they get into my bank, I can't spare any money right now. But, even $1 will help.


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Hickalberry Featured By Owner 1 day ago  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for the favie!Nico Yazawa Icon 
NightrunnerXM Featured By Owner Mar 3, 2017  Professional Digital Artist
Thanks for the fave, it's much appreciated! Please stop by again!
BlackEstella Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2017  Student Digital Artist
thanks \(*w*)/
ChubbyPumpkinn Featured By Owner Jan 11, 2017  Hobbyist General Artist
sunderhart Featured By Owner Dec 15, 2016
I am glad you liked.
MetalAmethyst Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2016  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you for the fave!
Rie--Rie Featured By Owner Nov 10, 2016  Student Digital Artist
Thank you kindly for the fave! :icondancingkennyplz:
ChubbyPumpkinn Featured By Owner Sep 16, 2016  Hobbyist General Artist
Favore by ChubbyPumpkinn  
gartastic Featured By Owner Jul 12, 2016
:iconspacejunesplz: thanks for the fav 
LexisSketches Featured By Owner Mar 11, 2016
:wave: Hello! Just a random deviant stopping by~
I hope you're having a wonderful day :eager:
:la: Happy March! :shamrock: :hug:
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